Monday, November 5, 2012

HUMOR: HOW NOLLYWOOD MURDERS MEDICAL SCENES





The Nigerian movie industry is one of the fastest growing in the world today, they are said to be the third largest after Hollywood and Bollywood.

I have watched some Nigerian films and I have noted some hilarious things when they act hospital scenes:

IT IS ONLY IN NOLLYWOOD THAT:


1.The doctor uses his stethoscope to check for the heartbeat on a patient's wrist.

2. Blood used for transfusion looks like Ribena, or a local drink called Zobo.

3. Primary school science charts are hung on the wall of a doctor's consulting room.

4. Bandages are tied like a turban around the head of a patient with a head injury.

5. The patient is in a coma, and is just placed on the bed, no oxygen, nothing. And he recovers.

6. The intensive care unit contains a bed and no machines.

7. The only hospital instruments are the doctor's stethoscope and the tray the nurse carries.

8. The drip is plastered to the patient's arm without a cannula.

9. The nurses always run to the doctor's office with their mouths wide open whenever there is an emergency.

10. The doctor checks the heart beat on the right side of the chest.

11. No matter how big the hospital is, there is always only one doctor on duty who somehow is a specialist in all fields of medicine.

12. Absolutely any material can be used as a hospital curtain.


I believe Nollywood is coming of age but have to do proper research when writing medical scripts.

And by the way, I am available for a small fee, if they need proper consultation when acting medical scenes.

Image courtesy.

8 comments:

  1. You sure you didn't see this on "Gray's Anatomy"? Sounds like something they'd do... ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hahaha, I've never used my eye of the critic to watch Grey's Anatomy, but will do so henceforth;)

      Delete
  2. I love medical gaffs in shows, but Nigeria certainly does not corner the market on it. ER and Grey's Anatomy come to mind. And my all time favorite medical movie, "Flatliners." Their anatomy lab was in some dimly lit rotunda with scaffolding and plastic hanging from the ceilings. It was bizarre. Ellen

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha! That really is bizarre, maybe they wanted to create a morbid effect (no pun intended). Thanks Ellen.

      Delete
  3. Kind of sounds like the portrayal of medicine in american soap operas. All the better - shows like ER have given americans a grossly skewed idea of how successful CPR really is.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes Peeper, I've always wondered about that myself.

      Delete
  4. Lovely stuff - but as said by your previous commentors - not alone to Nigeria.

    We have doctor soaps on TV here and one example of poor research (or really sloppy directing) was that of a doc taking a BP with the cuff upside down...

    Anna :o]

    ReplyDelete

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